Going on Vacation!

I’ve been crazy busy this week cause it’s my last week before vacationnn! I leave saturday, and I’m so glad cause I need them really really bad. But it’s been kinda tough too, cause my kitty worries me a lot, he eats sometimes, other times he doesn’t want to, and since I’m not home all day, I can’t be sure about how much he’s eating, cause I have 2 other kitties. I’ve been thinking if I should leave him at the vet’s or at home, and I think I’m just going to leave him at home, cause he will get so stressed at the vet’s for 2 weeks, that I’m afraid it might be worse for him. I’m not sure yet though, I just want my baby to be ok while I’m away.

My girlfriend was in a car accident monday, she got hit by a pick up truck. I’m so glad that she was wearing her seatbelt, she’s ok, just a little sore, but it was very scary. I hate that I wasn’t able to be there for her, but I’m so glad that she’s ok. Her car is pretty messed up though, but that’s not important.

So I’m leaving saturday, for 2 weeks, I’m going to a place in the middle of the mountains, it’s very nice and quiet and relaxing. Exactly what I need right now. I’ll just miss talking to my girlfriend, cause like I said before, cel phones don’t work there, so I will only be able to call her probably a couple of times. She’s really sad, but she’s trying to be good about it. But I just keep thinking, that when I come back it will be march already. It’s crazy how time is flying! Which is a good thing, cause it means, less time til she can come over here! Yay! :)

This was my second Valentine’s day with my girlfriend, and we have been apart for both of them. I know it’s just a day like any other, but it would have been nice to be able to spend it with her. She got on webcam for me though, and she’s so pretty! :) I love seeing her.

Anyway, I wanted to thank everybody for their comments, it makes me happy to read them. I’m sorry I haven’t been able to read blogs this week cause of work being so crazy. And now I’ll be gone for 2 weeks, but I’ll catch up with everybody when I get back from my vacation. I hope to be able to chat with some of you too. I’ll read you guys in 2 weeks!

I hate waiting

It’s so hard waiting… waiting for everything. I feel like my life’s on hold right now. I’m kinda cranky today cause I REALLY need a vacation, like NOW! I need to talk to my boss again to see when can I actually take my 2 weeks off, cause I’m at a point where I can barely work.

So I’m waiting… waiting for my vacation. Waiting to see if I get the loan for the apartment I’m buying, waiting to finally have my own place again. Waiting until my girlfriend can finally move over here. Have I mentioned that I REALLY hate waiting? Well I do. Maybe today everything seems worse cause I’m just exhausted.

So this is just a venting post, I want to feel like some things in my life are working out good, and right now I feel like everything is in the air, and that frustrates me a lot.

On another subject… when I take my 2 week vacation, I won’t really be able to talk to my girlfriend on the phone much, cause the place I’m going to is in the middle of the mountains and has no cel phone signal. So I know L will be upset and all, but I hope she understands that I really need the time off. This long distance thing is so hard, but I’m glad that we’ve been doing good lately. I just want to be done waiting… ok?

I want to skip a few months

So my bosses are back from their vacation, and I have to actually WORK! Ugh so annoying lol. But I was thinking, well I just HAVE to update my blog right? ;) I don’t feel like I usually have much to say, but I’ll think of something ha ha.

My kitty Guaton is doing a little better, he has been eating some on his own, so that’s really good. Plus I’ve been buying really yummy stuff for him to eat lol, I have to spoil my baby. I love my 3 kitties so so much, they are so adorable.

So things with my girlfriend have been good lately, which makes me pretty happy. We both have strong tempers, and sometimes we tend to fight a lot, even though we live far away from each other. Sometimes I wonder if it’s the long distance thing that frustrates both of us and makes us fight more, or if it’s just our tempers. But we are going through a good time lately, and I’m really glad cause it’s really draining to be fighting with the person you love all the time. It just gets so hard when we are both working and have little time to talk. I have to say I NEVER thought I could wait for her this long. It’s been a year and 2 months since I last (and first) saw her, and I really can’t believe it’s been that long already. We have a countdown for the day she’s coming here, and it’s crazy how fast time is going! :) Can I just sleep for the next 6 months and wake up when she’s here? lol I really wish I could!

I wonder how things are going to be when she actually gets here, I know I shouldn’t be dreaming about the future so much, but it’s hard not to. I want to know if she’s going to like it here, if we’ll be good together, so many things.

Right now I’m living with my mom (It’s only TEMPORARY lol), but I’m trying to get a loan to buy my own apartment… our own apartment, I really hope it works out, it would be so cool to have our own place and not have to rent. If it all works out, I should be moving into the new apartment around june, and my girlfriend should be getting here in august. Goddd can I fast forward a few months? Lol

I love my girlfriend

So I’m still pretty worried about my kitty Guaton.I spent all weekend just trying to get him to eat. And he ate some, I just have to keep trying to make him want to eat, cause he looks weak and has no appetite. He’s one of my babies and I worry a lot about him. Thanks so much to everybody for the good vibes for my baby. I have 3 kitties and I know how important it is that they eat, cause they get liver problems if they don’t. So I’m watching him closely, and I’m in touch with the vet. It just sucks that I have to work so I can’t watch him or make him eat while I’m at work ugh. I hope that he pulls through on his own, cause if he doesn’t start eating, the vet will have to put a feeding tube. I’ve been though that with another kitty, and it’s really not fun...

My girlfriend has been so good to me, I don’t know how she puts up with me sometimes, I swear. I’ve been so upset and stressed with work, and now my kitty, that my mood hasn’t exactly been the best. But she’s always there telling me how much she loves me and how important I am to her… She makes me melt I swear. And sometimes I wonder how can she love me so much, cause I feel like I’m a mess. I can’t wait until she can be here with me, I really really miss her so much. Can it be august already?

You know, reading all these blogs about families with 2 moms, has made me think about it more. I always thought that if I was in a lesbian relationship, I wouldn’t ever have kids. But I’ve been seeing how many couples there are out there, who have beautiful families, or are expecting a baby, and it gives me hope, that maybe some day, that could be me.

One of my kitties is sick

I’m so worried about one of my kitties… he hasn’t been eating much lately. I got him checked and they didn’t find anything really. But he still doesn’t want to eat, and if he doesn’t start eating really soon, he will get very sick… I just don’t know what to do, I’ve tried giving him things that he might like but he won’t really eat anything right now… sighs.

So I’ll answer a question Sandra asked me. I was born in the US, and we lived there only for like 2 years, then we came to Chile and we have lived here since then. My mom and dad are both Chilean. I didn’t like living in the US when I went there, from 2000 – 2003, no offense to anyone, but I just missed my family way too much, and I could only see them for 2 weeks a year. That’s just not enough for me.

So when things started with my girlfriend, the first thing I told her was that I was not going to move to the US again, I was really unhappy when I was living there. So she said she would move here, it might sound selfish of me, but I already tried living there, and I had a really hard time. So that’s the reason why I don’t want to move back there. I think it´s harder being a lesbian over here, it´s less common than in the US, people are more judgmental, but I just need to be close to my family.

I’m not much in a writing mood since I’m so worried about my kitty… I really hope he starts eating soon…

Relationships and coming out

*yawns* I’m sleepy. But then I’m sleepy pretty much every day I have to wake up early lol. Blogger is not letting me into some blogs, anyone else having this problem? It´s so annoying.

A post from Angel girl made me want to tell you guys more of my story. So I’ve lived in Chile most of my life, and after college I went to live to the US (cause I was born there). So while I was there, I met this girl that I had been talking to online for a really long time, and we had become really close friends, and for the first time I realized “wow, I might have more feelings for her than just friendship”. That was quite a realization, I couldn’t really believe it at first, that I was falling in love with a woman. After like 8 months of living in San Diego, I moved upstate NY to be with her. Things with her were never easy, but I’m stubborn, and I loved her, or thought I did I’m not sure anymore, so I had to give things a try. But it didn’t work out, I lived with her for 2 years, and we would fight so much, things were really bad. So I came back to Chile, and I didn’t want to be with a girl again, cause my experience wasn’t really the best, plus I didn’t want to have to face my family telling them I was gay. I dated a few guys, but things never worked out, I have to say that I really tried dating guys, but I was just not happy with them, I never felt like I was in love.

So while I was trying to date guys, I met my actual girlfriend online, and things with her felt so right, and natural, and even though I was with her for just a week, I was completely happy then.

Angel girl, I’m sure it must be very hard that your parents still don’t know. I was really scared about telling my mom, but one day she just asked me, and of course I couldn’t deny it anymore. I know she’s not happy with it, but she sorta accepts it I think. My dad it totally cool about it, and my sister rocks, they just want me to be happy. My brother doesn’t know cause I really don’t get along with him. I think I’ll tell some of my friends when I actually have my girlfriend with me, I don’t really want to tell them before that. I know that a lot of my friends won’t take it that great, but I guess that shouldn’t matter as much.

I’m a little scared about my girlfriend moving here, I have to admit that. I mean, we were only together for a week, and she’s moving to a different country, she knows only a little spanish, so I know things won’t be exactly easy. I’m just hoping for the best for both of us.

Thanks everybody for your comments, I love reading them! :)