I´m kinda back

Hi everybody.

I’m sorry I completely disappeared for so long, I went on vacation, then I had to return a little sooner than planned cause my dad’s blood pressure was really high, so I got scared. He is doing ok now, but he needs to take a lot of meds. Then I realized that I was depressed… that I didn’t really enjoy the vacation like I thought I would, and that I was just too stressed to be able to be ok. So I started taking anti depressants and they have been helping a lot I think, I feel better now.

Work has just been really stressing, I have a lot more responsibilities and I’m not really sure about how to do a lot of the things I’m doing so it’s scary. But I have faith that I will be able to do a good job. It just doesn’t leave a lot of free time, since I used to post while I was at work before ha ha. So those are basically the reasons why I have been gone. I don’t really think that I can keep up writing the blog regularly, and reading everybody’s blogs, cause of the lack of time, but I’m going to try to, cause I love reading about everyone and sharing the things that happen to me.

My kitty that wasn’t doing so well before, is doing pretty good now, so I’m really happy about that. He’s so freaking adorable lol, well I love my 3 kitties.

Things with my girlfriend have ups and downs, but all in all we have been ok. The day when she will come here is getting closer and closer, I can’t believe how fast time is going by. I really can’t wait, I don’t like being alone, I want to have her with me to be able to do stuff together (don’t think dirty thoughts lol). I know it will be hard too though, because I’ll have to tell people that don’t know about me being a lesbian, my friends and all, and I really don’t know how they will react. I’m glad my family knows and they are supportive, but people here are so closed minded, that’s one thing I don’t like. But I’ll deal with it, I need to do what makes me happy, no matter what the rest think right?

Anyway, I´m sorry for disappearing, I´ll try to catch up some with everybody and hope that you guys still remember me lol. ;)

Relationships and coming out

*yawns* I’m sleepy. But then I’m sleepy pretty much every day I have to wake up early lol. Blogger is not letting me into some blogs, anyone else having this problem? It´s so annoying.

A post from Angel girl made me want to tell you guys more of my story. So I’ve lived in Chile most of my life, and after college I went to live to the US (cause I was born there). So while I was there, I met this girl that I had been talking to online for a really long time, and we had become really close friends, and for the first time I realized “wow, I might have more feelings for her than just friendship”. That was quite a realization, I couldn’t really believe it at first, that I was falling in love with a woman. After like 8 months of living in San Diego, I moved upstate NY to be with her. Things with her were never easy, but I’m stubborn, and I loved her, or thought I did I’m not sure anymore, so I had to give things a try. But it didn’t work out, I lived with her for 2 years, and we would fight so much, things were really bad. So I came back to Chile, and I didn’t want to be with a girl again, cause my experience wasn’t really the best, plus I didn’t want to have to face my family telling them I was gay. I dated a few guys, but things never worked out, I have to say that I really tried dating guys, but I was just not happy with them, I never felt like I was in love.

So while I was trying to date guys, I met my actual girlfriend online, and things with her felt so right, and natural, and even though I was with her for just a week, I was completely happy then.

Angel girl, I’m sure it must be very hard that your parents still don’t know. I was really scared about telling my mom, but one day she just asked me, and of course I couldn’t deny it anymore. I know she’s not happy with it, but she sorta accepts it I think. My dad it totally cool about it, and my sister rocks, they just want me to be happy. My brother doesn’t know cause I really don’t get along with him. I think I’ll tell some of my friends when I actually have my girlfriend with me, I don’t really want to tell them before that. I know that a lot of my friends won’t take it that great, but I guess that shouldn’t matter as much.

I’m a little scared about my girlfriend moving here, I have to admit that. I mean, we were only together for a week, and she’s moving to a different country, she knows only a little spanish, so I know things won’t be exactly easy. I’m just hoping for the best for both of us.

Thanks everybody for your comments, I love reading them! :)